MINIMAL EFFORT

You may want to think twice about that job offer...

Update: I've Snagged Myself an Agent

Are they all they're cracked up to be?

COVID is changing. In a bad way… With the South African strain attacking the UK, and the ever-adjusting nature of the virus, it’s...

How did you spend your lockdown Christmas?

Studies show Anti-Maskers possess a lower cognitive function than the rest of us. Take from that what you will...

Illegal Brothels: what's it like to work for one?

Saturday night. There’s a good chance you’ll go out with friends. Shit pints of lager, fruity cocktails, a jaeger-bomb or two. The basic...

Every type of person has a place that keeps the human race ticking over. All except one. Our creepy little psychopaths...

There’s been a few times this lock-down I’ve realised that I hate (most) people. An example is when a group of Neanderthals hung round...

4 Easy to Make, Classic Cocktails: White Rum Edition

Gin - Everyone's Favourite Spirit

4 Classic Cocktails to Make During Lock-down: Vodka Edition

'Oh, You Don't Know What a Flat White is?' - Part 2. I’ll just say it how it is. Being stuck inside for so long is messing up my sleep...

I've got a captive audience at the moment. You’re all stuck at home, which means you’re more likely to read my awful, awful articles. I...

“It’s only mud. It could be worse,’ said my colleague. “How?” I whimpered, my hair dripping with brown liquid. “A guy I knew once jumped...

As we sat on the boat, I thought about the inevitable Ryan Air flight home. Mr Cheques seemed to have some personal vendetta against the...

There was blood everywhere. Even on my copy of Bram Stoker’s Dracula. Trust me, the irony wasn’t lost. Everyone on the bus looked at us,...

There was a time during my teenage years where I would drink just about anything. It’s the same for everyone in Britain. And if you say...

I'm back. Sorry to disappoint. It’s been a while since I’ve written anything. Some of you might have noticed. Some of you probably don’t...